ICDT #51: Seven Unhelpful Voices

On today’s podcast episode I’m sharing a little bit about each of the seven unhelpful voices that sometimes take the steering while of our lives.

At its core, each voice does not believe it already has what it needs. So, it finds a way to whisper (or yell) in your ear to get your attention. When they feel backed into a corner these voices may lash out. Here’s an example from each voice. See if you recognize any of these:

• Stressed Achiever - You haven’t achieved enough yet. You haven’t proved yourself. Get on it!
• Positive Thinker - You can’t possibly have everything yet. But I know how to get it. Let’s go!
• Inner Critic - It’s not perfect yet. We are going to get this right if it’s the last thing we do.
• Anxious Controller - You don’t have enough control. What if things go awry? What will happen then, huh?!
• Complaining Victim - That other person is keeping you from being happy. If they would just change, then you’d have what you need. Until then you are stuck.
• Passive Spectator - And you don’t know how to get it. You only have so much energy and we’ve got more important things to do like hide, be scared, and remain unfulfilled. That way you never have to be disappointed.
• Unsatisfied Heart - How could you possibly fill that giant void in your heart? There is no way to fill up this space, and even if you try there’s no way it will happen any time soon.

Seeing the voices this starkly can make us either laugh or cry. But when these unhelpful thoughts circle around in our brain, they seem very real—and they feel like the truth.

But remember what we said before, you are not your thoughts. These voices come from any number of places inside of us. Past traumas, unhealthy relationships and more cause us to self-protect. And these voices are really trying their best to keep us safe.