Four Stages of Prayer: Where Are You on the Journey?

Blog by Gem Fadling

“A beginner must think of herself as one setting out to make a garden in which her Beloved Lord is to take his delight.” (St. Teresa of Avila) 

St. Teresa of Avila was a spirited and insightful sixteenth-century Carmelite nun. She loved using everyday imagery to explain the deep mysteries of the soul. I (Gem) like to imagine her walking beside me in a garden, her voice warm and encouraging as she shares her wisdom: Your soul is a garden lovingly tended for the delight of God. 

Over the course of her life, Teresa began to experience the richness of prayer more fully. Out of her experience, she wrote about a soul’s growth using a rich and practical metaphor: the Four Waters. 

These four ways of watering your soul are not merely stages of prayer but invitations to journey with God. Wherever you find yourself, God is tending to you with love.

Let’s explore these waters and see where God might meet us today. 

Drawing Water from the Well: When Prayer Feels Like Work 

 Teresa describes the first stage of prayer as drawing water from a well. Imagine the effort of lowering a bucket, pulling it up brimming, and then carrying its heavy weight to your garden. This is the season when prayer feels like work.

This first stage is labor-intensive, as it represents our initial efforts in prayer and learning to detach from distractions. We are reminded of the necessity of perseverance. Our efforts are more a cooperation than a cause, and we are transformed as we rely on God’s grace.

You might be forming the habit of daily prayer, learning to quiet your mind, or wrestling with distractions. This can feel like work, but try not to get discouraged. Your efforts here are watering the seeds God has planted in your soul. 

In this stage, the focus is on showing up. God is with you as you are praying through scripture, journaling, or simply sitting in silence.

Turning the Water Wheel: When Prayer Becomes a Joy 

 The second stage is like using a water wheel to draw water, and it may feel like a little less work. As the wheel turns, dippers scoop the water and pour it into a trough, gradually irrigating the garden. 

This is when prayer starts to flow more naturally. It may still take intention, but you’re beginning to enjoy the process. You might feel a growing sense of God’s presence or find it easier to focus your heart and mind. Prayer becomes quieter and you aren’t grasping for goodies so much in prayer.

In this stage, prayer becomes a source of refreshment. You may notice your garden is greener and your soul more alive. Teresa describes this as a time when the soul begins to collect itself, leaning into God with greater trust. 

A Flowing Stream: When Prayer Flows Freely

 In the third stage, the garden is watered by a steady stream. You don’t need to labor at all. The stream flows and you merely dip in to refresh yourself. 

This stage reflects a deepening intimacy with God. Prayer becomes less about what you say or do and more about resting in God’s presence. You may notice God’s grace flowing through your day, refreshing you in unexpected ways. 

And as refreshing as it is that you are no longer carrying your own water, this stage might still involve difficulties, inviting you to unite yourself even deeper with Jesus. It’s good to stand firmly in trust as your soul and spirit are strengthened in surrender.

It’s in this season that we begin to trust God more fully with the areas of our lives that need care. Like a gardener walking along the stream, you simply dip in when needed, allowing the Holy Spirit to guide your attention to the dry or weary places. 

Receiving the Rain: When Prayer Becomes Pure Gift

 Finally, we come to the rain. Like a Tuscan vineyard that is dry farmed, this is the stage where the garden receives water directly from the skies. No effort from the gardener is required.

St. Teresa calls this the Prayer of Union, a moment when God’s love overwhelms your soul. St. Ignatius of Loyola might call this “consolation without cause.” Grace rushes toward us without warning, warming and delighting the soul.

This stage reminds us that ultimately our souls belong to God. Just as a farmer who plants and tends a wheat field relies on God’s creative process to grow the wheat, so we tend our garden of prayer but God makes it flourish. Rain refreshes, renews, and brings forth beauty we can’t create on our own. 

This final stage, where the soul rests in God’s presence through no effort of its own, is pure grace. Such contemplative union is typically brief but quite transformative. Being embraced by divine love is its essence.

Wherever You Are, God Is with You 

 St. Teresa’s Four Waters demonstrates that prayer isn’t about perfection—it’s about relationship. Some days you may feel like you’re hauling water from the well, exhausted by the effort. Other days you might sense the gentle flow of the stream or find yourself surprised by a sweet rain. 

Wherever you are, know this: God is tending your soul with great care. He delights in every moment you spend with him, whether it’s in struggle, joy, surrender, or awe. 

So press on. Keep tending your garden. God is the Master Gardener, and he is faithful to bring your soul into full bloom. 

For Reflection: 

• Which stage of the Four Waters best describes your current experience of prayer?
• How might you open yourself more fully to God’s work in your soul, no matter your stage?
• What small practice can you begin today to tend the garden of your soul with greater care?